a thing about me

saya sangat tidak gemar mencuba sesuatu yang baru.

anything yang baru.

mungkin itu menjelaskan kenapa saya taknak pergi oversea.

culture baru, makanan baru. tidak mahu.

atau kenapa saya tak suka search lagu baru.

kecuali dah terdengar lagu tu kat radio dulu.

atau kenapa hingga kini saya taknak cuba coke susu.

sebab terbayang rasa dia pun terus loya.

atau kenapa hari ini saya tak minum air untuk berbuka tadi.

papa beli air kathira, buat air kiwi, buat air kurma.

semua tu tak pernah rasa (kecuali kathira), dan tak hingin nak rasa.

air kathira tu rasa dia pelik gila, tercemar taste buds aku T_T

sudahnya minum air kosong je hari ni.

biarlah, i rela.

at least air kosong saya dah biasa rasa. 

dan...

mungkin ini juga menjelaskan kenapa saya tak suka pergi tempat asing.

i completely suck at berkenalan dengan kawan baru.

masa masuk maahad, masuk uitm...

urgh.

lagi satu, saya susah gila nak bercakap dgn org yg baru kenal. T_T

tapi yg dah kenal saya bolehlah tahu perangai sebenar saya.

which is gila beyond words.

sekian.

UCAPAN RAYA:

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri lovelies!

Maaf zahir dan batin.

siapa nak kad raya boleh claim ogeyyy. hihi

makes you wanna fall in love, isn't it?

nobody can make better cheesy but cute love songs other than Sheila On 7.

so nanti tolong download lagu Kita, dan dengar.

it's too sweet! *_*

talking to the star.

dear star,

i hope you're still not sleeping, like i do. see, i... i need to talk to someone. i can't talk about this to anybody else. i'm afraid they'd call me pathetic. then, i found you. hear me out, please. 

i... i'm in love with this one guy. but i don't think he feels the same. i don't know what to do. to pray for him to like me too, for me, is a kind of cruelty. like i'm forcing him to have feelings for me, don't you think? and i think if we are meant to be together, he would have feelings for me, without me having to pray and make wishes. but if we don't...

dear star, can i make some wishes? maybe you'll think these are petty wishes, but i... these mean the whole world to me.

i wish he'd click on my profile as much as i did on his.

i wish he'd take a look at his phone, scroll my number, and think of whether he should text me or not.

i wish he'd wonder where i went when i didn't contact him for several days.

i wish he'd ask where i went.

i wish he'd reply those unreplied messages.

i wish he'd remember me sometimes.

i wish he'd talk to me about me, not anybody else.

how i wish...

dear star, please do not say i'm pathetic. i got nowhere else to turn to.

and how i wish...

and how i wish i wasn't in this much pain every time i'm thinking about him.

and i wish... i can forget him. but i don't want to...

helpless romantic.

does anybody know how i hate cheesy movies?

actually i don't hate them, more like

I FORCE MYSELF TO HATE THEM.

i'm actually a sucker for fairytales and sweet love stories.

how a guy and a girl who always fight about everything,

and the guy ended up realizing that girl is the most beautiful girl he ever met,

and he found himself falling for her, without her realizing it.

i always imagine what my life would be if that REALLY happens.

is it logical that some guy - cute, adorable, sweet, - be able to fall for a nobody like me?

will someone look at me, lovingly, without me realizing it?

will someone always look at me from afar, without me knowing?

i still think The Phantom of the Opera is actually romantic.

then i brush them thoughts off and laugh.

who would be stupid enough to do that to me? Heh.

deep in my heart, i kinda envy some girls who're adored by many guys.

i rarely get into that kind of situation.

although sometimes i do think positively about my looks, talents and whatnot.

i once dreamt to be a comic artist so that guys will think i'm cool and like me.

i'm kind of pathetic, aren't I? Heh.

i long for a sweet guy to take care of me.

who always give me something out of the blue.

don't matter what it is - a lollipop, a shirt, a shawl, even a scribbling.

heck, i think something that someone's willing to draw/write for me

is the sweetest gift of all.

tulis macam ni je pun can make me a thousand times happy..

yang boleh bawak i dating tepi pantai...

yang tiba-tiba bagi i bunga...

yang boleh makan share satu pinggan...

told y'all i'm a sucker for romance T_T

but hey, maybe my thoughts are actually real.

maybe there is someone out there who fits these criteria,

without me knowing?

who knows, sometimes our lives are just like in the movies. :)

dahlah, orang sahur, aku berangan. Ceh.

Selamat berpuasa hari ke-12! :)

judgmental | 2

Salam Ramadhan.

subuh tadi agak terbengang sikit dgn seseorang.

yg mcm menghina aku kerana aku tak cukup alim?

mungkin.

aku memang budak nakal kat sekolah.

aku tau ramai, lagi2 lelaki, confirm pandang slack kat aku.

tapi...

kau ada hak ke nak judge aku ni baik ke tak?

kau ada hak nak claim kau lebih beriman dari aku?

kat Facebook aku ada dua org ni yg selalu cakap pasal agama.

aku suka baca apa yg dorang cakapkan.

aku kan kurang ilmu, maka aku belajar dari mereka.

walaupun cara penyampaian mereka agak rude.

tapi kita buang yg keruh, ambil yg jernih la, kan?

since semalam, mereka2 ni semacam carik pasal pula.

sorg duk cakap pasal mengaji, lepastu boleh pulak tag aku kat status.

aku sorang je pulak tu.

aku paham niat kau mungkin nak memain, atau nak ajak mengaji sama.

tapi cara kau seperti memalukan aku, faham?

yg lagi sorang pulak senang2 cakap

"bulan puasa ni baik fokus kat benda lain."

ya, aku dan rakan2 aku mmg buat benda tak berfaedah semalam.

tapi...

kau mungkin tak nampak kami bertarawih atau bertadarus, kan?

aku siap bertaranum sekali tau. #over

iman ni kita sukar nak telah.

so janganlah judgmental.

sedangkan wanita freehair yg sembahyang pun aku dah pandang tinggi.

just because i didn't share anything religious on FB,

it doesn't mean i know nothing bout religion, at all.

aku taknak share dgn niat selain kerana Allah.

iman aku ni lemah.

pendek kata,

hablum minAllah wa hablum minannas.

kalau hablum minannas tu takde tak guna jugak dik non!

remember, it's bad to judge!

lagi baik kalau sama2 buat amal. :)

bestfriends are like a four-leaf clover, right?

hahahahaha the sweetest day of my life.

dah beberapa jam chatting dekat skype dgn manusia2 ni,

and still chatting.

alkisah, aku terlambat join mereka di skype walaupun telah berjanji.

maka aku telah dihanjengkan uols!

menangis tengok wajah bunga matahari aku di skype!

ni tak tengok lagi dari point-of-view aku. ada 5 gambar lahanat ni uols!

lepastu masa di skype,

boleh pulak manusia2 ni banyak sgt buat typo.

harussslah dihanjengkan kembali oleh iols.

gedik jadi gedih, topik jadi topok (this one's my favourite), la jadi laj...

surit lah, ongong lah..

berguling2 aku tergelak sambil membahan wanita2 veteran ini.

last2 aku kena sabotaj,

gamba bunga matahari aku telah dihanjengkan menjadi DP semua orang!

tengok berderet-deret gambar durjana tu.

dan aku rasa esok macam makin bertambah je bilangan syaiton ni.

ahahahah.

papehal pun, kau org dah buat aku gelak gila2 the whole night.

lagipun bestfriend adalah seseorang yg aku klasifikasikan sebagai

seseorang yg boleh membahan aku tanpa aku sakit hati.

ni kalau org lain yg buat ni memang lappy aku dah mendarat di kepala mereka.

so, consider you guys as lucky!

and i'm also lucky sbb dapat kawan hawau mcm korang.

hehe love you guys!

judgmental?

Assalamualaikum to whoever that still gives a hoot about this blog.

sayang kamu lebihhhhhh hehe.

di bulan Ramadhan yang mulia ini,

tiba2 daku terasa semakin suci, mungkin sbb syaiton digari.

ha tak payah nak 'ujub takabbur bagai. -,-

baru2 ni, seronottttt sangat baca blog Kak Senduk!

he is too too funny!

Kak Senduk ni adalah seorang lelaki soft ya.

but who says we have the right to judge him?

bila baca blog dia, terasa macam insaf pun ada.

golongan2 macam ni memang selalu diumpat keji oleh masyarakat.

and yet mereka ni strong gila, serap makian!

kalau aku memang dah feeling nak terjun bangunan

dek sayu dimaki sebegitu T_T

dalam blog dia, dia ada cakap,

dia tahu mana dosa, that's why dia tak buat pembedahan gender.

touching kot.

bagi aku, aku boleh terima lelaki berperangai lembut

SELAGI MEREKA PAKAI BAJU LELAKI

DAN BOLEH TAHAN NALURI DORANG DARI JADI GAY.

pun bolehhhh

memang, lelaki suka lelaki tu naluri,

tapi benda tu tak semestinya tak boleh dikawal.

insyaAllah, kalau azam kau kuat. :)

lepastu insaf la jugak sebab dulu selalu gelakkan fonen2 ni,

macam golongan bapok Jati dulu.

also, that one senior dekat Fakulti Pendidikan.

jangan buat gila, mereka2 yg kita kutuk dan gelakkan ni lah

yang sentiasa score 3.7 pointer!

mungkin makian orang ramai tu mendatangkan berkat pada dorang?

and another good thing i learned from them

is their self-confidence.

walaupun badan tak berapa wanita tapi still pandang diri as cantik.

sedangkan aku yg wanita betul ni selalu insecure,

rasa diri buruk gemuk apa2 lagilah. sobs.

all in all, mereka ni mengajar aku supaya

jangan judgmental dan

jangan kisah apa orang lain nak kata.

another thing is

aku mendoakan golongan2 tidak straight ni berubah.

Amiiiin. :)

1 Ramadhan

i welcome you, Ramadhan, with happiness and will.

the will to perform as many ibadah as i can!

and to transform myself to someone better. :)

alhamdulillah, selesai sahur.

takde rasa liat nak bangun tadi, mungkin sbb excited. hehe.

sekarang menunggu Subuh.

misi hari ini:

read al-Quran/surahs.

sembahyang awal waktu.

jangan makan banyak masa berbuka, 

and solat sunat tarawih.

insyaAllah.

i'm so happy!

i hope you guys are, too!