Thursday, September 29, 2011


why do we keep it?
because it is embarrassing.

so, God, i can only pray one thing.
tutuplah aibku. Amin.

 i still think it's complicated.
i have developed feelings on this one guy.
when i watched him sleep,
there is only one word appearing in my mind.

still self-exploring, though.
but my greatest achievement for now is

i've kept this biggest secret of mine.
no one had any idea about this guy. 

it's like the feeling you get when you look up at the sky
and you see those beautiful stars
and you're enjoying the view. 
Alone. Just you.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

span's life dictionary

annoying (adj.) - people nowadays spell it as annoyink; doing the exact opposite of what you don't want people to do to you.

love (n.) - something so subjective, never sure, very complicated; it can turn 180 degrees without warning.

tension (n.) - something that makes you feel like you cannot update your blog due to too much things going on in your mind, but instead you're updating it three times a day.

Monday, September 26, 2011

raging hormones

recently my mind and my heart scream two different things.

i kept looking at him and my mind keep screaming

fuck. Fuck. FUCK. Look away, you stupid fuck.
Eyes, Y U no listen to orders?!

then i went all depressed and moody.
not because of him,
but because of all these battles i was having inside.

it's fucking stupid and i hate it T____T

i am having a crush on TWO different guys,
but i'll forget about them whenever i don't see them.

and what's even more confusing,
my mind keeps telling my body to stay away from him,
but my heart keeps moving my feet towards his direction.

i feel like screaming for help now.
i must be going crazy because my body won't follow my orders.

and what's more insane?
my crush on Mister Aries is, suddenly, gone.
what. the. fuck? O_O

i'm gonna end this now.
i blame this solely on my PMS. :D

Sunday, September 25, 2011

premenstrual syndrome

maybe that explains my stupid behaviour recently.

i forget, a lot.
i space out,
i do things i shouldn't and vice versa.
i'm depressed when i should be happy,

and i'm having a fuckin' stupid crush on people i shouldn't.

please, God. please.
when my period ends, i hope all these end too.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

what's ironic to you?

once, i had a crush on this boy.
but it was just a small crush, nothing much.
i used to look at him from afar,
for i never had a chance to know him.

suddenly, i dunno.
our destiny lines kinda got tangled,
and he was the first one who approached me.
we became friends.
close friends.
he'd call me sometimes just to confide his secrets with me.
we would never feel awkward to walk together,
just the two of us.

however, my feelings to him has faded.
a long time ago, before we became friends.

if i still have feelings for him,
there is no doubt i'll become the happiest person
in the whole wide world.

what's ironic to you?


recently i got to know this one guy.
he is soooo pendiam and rarely smiles.
somehow, he intrigues me.

so, mission now:
make him smile. :)

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

nerdy me.

this time.

no more oversleeping.
no more skipping class. 
no more last-minute assignments.
no more solat lambat.

i don't care if i'm becoming a nerd.
this is the 5th semester,
and i wanna excel.
so freakin' bad.

insyaAllah :)

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

unrequited love

some people think it's sad
and pathetic;
but for me, it's beautiful.

it's amazing, right?
the things we would do for 
an unrequited love.
but never did
when we already have it.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

prepare for raya!

ingredient rempah rendang:



cili kering.


demmit, lengkuas tu sekeras batu uols. esok jela aku sambung kupas T_T

ingredient ketupat:

beras dalam 20 pot.

sarung ketupat dua baldi.


rendang yang sedang dimasak.

sumbek bereh dalam sarung ketupat sambil tengok maharaja lawak.

Selamat Hari Raya, people. ;)