si tembam2 saya.

alhamdulillah, today was a big blast with sedare mare after several days of terperuk kt umah. :D

kak niza baru balik dgn membe2 die, and although die bwk membe2 die join gathering family kitorg, ak dh xbother sgt dah.. biarlah, masing2 dah besar kn? :)

tp wada ade gak ckp die sedih sbb jd cmth. takpe wada, nanti kite plan ramai2 gi genting, jeleskan dorang pulak okeh :D

sgt rindu dgn sedare mare saye. too bad family mak cu + syerot takde. family pak ngah, well, biaselah, die sorg jek yg ade.

makanan die very the menggoda okeh. roti jala dgn kuah kari yg saaaangat banyak kentang, pulut kuning, nasi tomato, rendang itik [yah, awesome ryte~? :D], and a big choc fudge cake yg mmg sedap nk mampus. bahahahah.

anyhow xsmpt nk mkn sume, ak smpt tala roti jala dgn kek jek. bile kau dah duduk2 dgn sdare mare, lapar tuh ilang aje. haha

hope to go to cherating dgn sedare2 tersayang ak pulokk. :D

oh lupa, takde gambar sbb sume gamba ak td freehair. hoho

apakah?

papehal pun, sedara lg penting dr membe2.

sanggup ke kau, if sedare kau dtg umh, kau pulak pegi cherating dgn membe2 kau? then, kau tinggalkan laptop kau sbb kau pikir sedare kau boleh buat laptop tu jd teman dikala sunyi.

like, what is wrong with you???

atau anda tiap kali pegi shah alam tak penah bagitau, dgn alasan anda jalan2 dgn membe2 walhal sedara-mara anda belajar uitm je kot.

and all the time anda pergi konsert2/jalan2 sentiasa dgn membe2, never with ur sedare.

and time kenduri kahwin SEDARA pun, anda lagi rela lepak dgn membe2 as if anda tetamu, walhal sedara-mara anda busy bg bunga telur kt org2 yg dtg.

apakah??

ye, mmg anda tua, anda patut kawan dgn someone your own size. tp jgn smpy lupa sedara boleh?

bear in mind, mereka2 tuh anda kenal kat facebook je kot.

*this is just a situation i see in my life. takde kene ngene ngn sape2 pun. just tetibe rase panas hati. :P

it is u who makes me smile. :)

1) berjaya membeli kek tiramisu untuk papa. tapi tak selebret lagi. it's a surprise! :)

2) went to the new house today. it was awesome. soon we're gonna take our stuff here to there. it's almost done, btw. thank God for this. ngeeeee :D

3) this sunday ada gathering sedare mare belah papa a.k.a org2 nogori kat umah mak bung. mak bung ngn mak lang nak pegi umrah bulan 6 nnt. mama dh plan nk beli cheesecake :D

4) gathering belah mama pulak, sabtu minggu dpn. :)

5) lesen L in a week's time.

6) birthday budak tembam a.k.a ungku pada 31st. :D

i so love my family. :')

ini post emo, early notice.

i'm so tired of my old friends not remembering who i am. nak explain satu hal. nk add satu hal. nk catchup satu hal lg. urgh. rase desperate tau tak bile kite dok explain2 kite nh sape and in the end they still don't remember. padahal budak tu penah dtg rumah kau lagi. skali boleh terus tak ingat. :-/ ak tau, ak pn ade tak ingat membe2 lame ak. tp at least if dorg add ak, and ckp dorg membe skola rendah, i would approve, ye tuan2 dan puan2. bukan dgr2 explanation, then act dumb sbb malas nak layan.aihh.ak sensitif benda2 sal member nh. hmm. abaikanlah.

emosi tak tentu hari nh. :O

27 mei itu best.

harini bangun awal dlm pukul 6.

sbb ada ceramah tuh. :D

mcm sakit hatilah jugak,

dtg sane pukul 7, ceramah start 9 stgh.

annoying! haha

btw, crmh hari nh lg interesting la dr crmh undang2 dulu.

so, takde rase nk tido.

plus ak jumpa dgn membe2 tadika dgn skula rndh dulu.

reunion - time kau tak plan time tula die nak jadi.

so seronok sket sbb ade membe.

tukang bg ceramah tu pn sempoi gilaaaa.

kau bygkan, ckgu tuh boleh bgtau pukul brape tanpa tgk jam.

tatawla if ade trick ke ape, tp sumpah seronok.

tiap kali die tnye "ade soklan x?" ktowg tnye "skang kul bpe ckgu?" :D

hmm. setel sume.

L bkal dpt dlm seminggu lg.

after that belajar2 smpy sebulan.

test JPJ last.

hmm. lamenye. tensen tggu. :O

so, mlm nh, plan nk beli kek utk papa.

ak nk chocolate, abg ak nk blueberry cheesecake sbb tu favorite papa.

tp hari tu bday mama pn dh beli kek blueberry gak [papa yg pilih, of course].

ak bosaaaaaaaaaaaannn~

hidup penuh bunga2 bluberi. :-/

anyway, biarlah, jnji papa happy.

skang dlm proses kumpul duit.

we love u daddy! :)

lulus! ke? :D

so, woke up early today to go to the undang2 test.

dlm pukul 9 gitu.

nmpk cm ade sorg dak pmpn dh ready tggu kt situ,

tbe2 dak pmpn uh ckp "hai" kt ak ngn muka mesra gilaa.

ak tataw nk react ape. knal ke dak nh???

then die ckp, kitorg satu kelas masa drjah 3 dulu.

ya ampun.

kalo yg drjh 5/6 nye membe pn ku xingt,

inikn drjh 3.

tp mke die cm familiar gak la.

and ak lega sket sbb ade membe nk test skali. :)

terus terang ckp, ak mmg takut gle test nh.

bpe kali ak suruh ungku jgn ltak fon dulu smlm.

supaya die dpt pujuk n support ak. :D

at last dlm kul 2 stgh bru ak tdo.

tu pn dgn pertolongan ubat batuk dan selsema.

maka tadi, dlm proses menjawab test uh,

budak sebelah tegur ak. die nh laki.

die siap tau name ak lg.

penat ku tenung die, nk tau die nh sape.

tp ak rase die nh membe skula rendah jugak. :-/

die tnye: "gear tinggi bape eh?"

astaga. muka ak mcm muka org yg amek berat ttg gear ke? :D

budak laki tu org first yg habis jawab.

die dpt 39/50.

xlepas, so die kena wt lg.

ak dh nervous gilaa tgk mrkh mamat tuh.

ak cek lg skali, and jumpe satu soklan yg ak slh jwb.

betulkan - end session - result:

42/50.

lega mmg lega.

tp rase fucked up gak la sbb tu mmg markah minimum tuk lulus.

aihh, pape jelah. janji lepas. :D

amik gambar.

dhla akak uh xckp kepala ak teleng.

then ade pulak org sblah die leh wt lawak.

terus ak trgelak, dan tadaaa!

muka utk lesenku mmg buruk tahap cibai.

hmm. konklusi, ceramah lg satu hari khamis nh.

aiyaaaa~

penatlah nk bangun pg lg. :P

but can't wait to finish this tiresome stuff.

nota kaki:

smlm suruh mama buatkan agar2 roti tp die xbuat.

bila die suruh buatkan esaimen die last2 ak wt bodo jek.

tula, mntk buatkan agar2 tak buat. :D

smlm pujuk2 papa g tesco.

ak bosan gilaaa duk umh.

last2 ak bg alasan telur dgn gula dh habis.

papa buat bodooooooo jek smpy ade mkck uh dtg.

cite2 pasal rumah nh, ade org lain nk beli.

dlm pukul 10 mkck uh balik.

ak bodek2 lg papa ckp nk kua, last2 die on unser.

dlm kete papa ckp "ak nk kua dh sbnrnye td tp cik nah dtg pulak."

boohoo~~~ tesco ak~~~ T^T

papa, lain kali bila diajak keluar siap cpt2. huhu

hmm. bukan nota kaki dh pnjg lebar gini. :D

KISS

okay, this is gonna be a quick one, since my bro's home and we will like berebut nak pakai internet.

1. test undang-undang lusa, and ak tak bace pape lg. so plz, just pray for me. sbb ku malas sgt nak baca.

2. apa rase eh nak hang out dgn bestfriend kau dr skola rendah? kurasa awkward. :-/

3. saya rindu encik faliq salihan. why? cuz he's a damn good friend for a guy, and die suddenly hilang dr hidup ak mcm ak ade buat salah besar. if i have plz lemme know. my birthday wish two days ago went unreplied, [and dozens of other ppl's too]. where has he gone? i miss him terribly. after all, die sorg je yg pggl ak ata, so tu jek dh prove die pnye special untuk ak. ngeheh. lelems2, jgn rase jeles or what cuz kau org ttp yg plg kusyg n rindu smpy bile2.

4. and encik ungku, saye mmg rindu anda but i'm glad that since we're home we hardly find any time to argue cuz we're too busy missing each other. xoxo

told ya it's gonna be a quick one. out

design.

ini adalah salah satu design yg ak dah termimpi-mimpi nak buat sejak dr maahad dulu.

ak mmg sgt suka bintang2 nh.

beg ak bintang, kasut ak bintang, baju ak bintang.

i mean the corak.

maka inilah hasilnya:

ak buat nih bukan serius pun.

lebih kepada menghabiskan masa dan tenaga.

lagi2 bile terbukak paint smlm. :D

maka ini telah menjadi wallpaper lappy ku.

but not for long, i guess.

well, see you guys around. ;)

blogsearching :D

05.28 a.m. and still not asleep.

dunno why.

maybe sbb tgk cite elm street tu kot.

takut nak tido. meuhuhuhu

maka, saya mencari blog ramai2 org yg ada.

worth reading, followed.

seronok ak baca thoughts org nih. :D

upon reading some, i realize that

1) pretty people can be insecure, too.

2) some ppl whom i never came to like much, have actually many problems to face, and i started to feel guilty for feeling that way to them.

3) some are never what i thought them to be.

perhaps i am being superficial. and judgemental. and bad. :-/

i wish i can be who i am before.

yg tgk semua org dgn positif.

[dah beribu2 kali ak doa benda nh].

oh, sgt lapa sekarang.

mnyesal tak masak maggi.

my joy my happiness.

pukul 3.31 am,

berjaya mencuri kabel internet.

hoho.

act bru bngn tdo n smyg isyak. :P

firstly,

happy birthday mommy :)

ini kek yg kami belikan.

eventhough xseberapa,

it was enough to make her happy :')

birthday papa [28hb] kne beli kek lg besar! ngee

blueberry cheesecake.

secondly,

selesai jugak ceramah undg2 5 jam td.

pukul 7 dah naik van pegi sane.

register bagai, kul 10 bru start ceramah.

sumpah bosan.

pukul 3 habis, naik van,

xsmpy ati nk mntk uncle tu hantarkan.

call papa.

"eh, cina tu ckp nk hantar balik. p****k die." kate papa.

pastu papa belanja topup. ngee.

and oh, test computer 25hb. :D

next, ikut papa anta mirul balik tknik sepang.

"aih, xmuak lg kau berjalan?" kata papa lagi.

if ceramah 5 jam tu di-consider as berjalan,

ak rela pergi balik sepang 5 kali okay. huhu

then otw home,

singgah rumah baru.

i can't believe my eyes.

it's beautiful!!!!

nak nangis tengok. haha

soon, i'm gonna live here. :)

ini rumah.

hall. cantik kan colour turqoise?? :D

dapur.

bilik tetamu. ewah!

dua bilik kaler hijau. share abg mirul faris.

ini bilik ibu bapa ak. sumpah tak aci.

mine! :)

lampu kat tangge. meriah. :D

beranda di atas.

cantik kan??

heee can't wait.

randomness in the middle of the morn. :O

5.00 a.m.

i miss talking to him :D

i can't wait for my mama's birthday [15th may],

and i guess i'll buy her some cake.

i don't care bout my money!

membe2 ak sume ckp ak dh makin berisi.

aihhh.

cmane?

ak pegi jusco td,

tetbe teringin nk carik keje kat kedai buku popular tuh.

can i? can i??

*papa: kau boleh ke bangun pagi?* :P

ak sgt takot nak amek lesen.

and firstly sbb takde kawan.

nnt i'll shy away! :(

been reading lin's blog, pasal muet.

and ak teringat ak tertido mase test listening dulu. :D

i think he's still mad at me.

hmm. hmm. :-/

cekak merah. :D

sudah beli kt bonita.

xley tgkp gmba ak pkai sbb freehair. hoho.

enough randomness,

i think i'm gonna puke.

lesen? :O

hari nih daftar lesen.

trbg rm100.

hmm. tak konfidenlah. :(

ptg nh nk g jusco. ngee.

lupekn dulu kisah lesen. :D

congrats people :)

kpd nur atiqah nordin,

tahniah sbb dpt interview tesl...

kau mmg sgt2 terer okay!

and i believe u'll go further in this.

good luck! :)

and to fatin baharudin,

kau dpt uitm shah alam kn,

i can't wait to see you!

tell me every detail nnt, ok?

good luck jugak!

will pray hard for both of you. :)

my beauties.

alhamdulillah, satu bnde dh setel.

maka post memaki2 telah di-delete.

i'm happy we're friends again.

i love you guys. :)

cmon people~~

hey, what's with this obsession to some hot guy?

and with that lovey-dovey things you wrote for him?

seriously, rase geli. :P

come on la, accept the fuckin' truth.

he's unapproachable, far away from u, n if u make no effort to meet him and say something,

then just don't dream about it.

blerkh.

i just dunno how people came to love him that much.

and make their own assumption about him.

and unbelievably, EVERYONE had a hope within themselves,

that he would somehow get to know them and talk to them one day.

puh-leaseeee.

he knows all about this.

but it's u guys who should make the move.

not writing some gooish love thingy for him.

ak geli lah! hahahaha

no heart feelings, okay.

sape2 yg ske lelaki2 hot tuh. haha

what is wrong?

org tu dh jnji dgn kau.

since ptg td.

tp tbe2 die dh ckp die penat. nada trpkse.

die dh buat kau rse serba salah.

and ble die last2 ckp nk buat jugak sbb dh jnji,

u know deep in ur heart that

SOMETHING is going to happen.

and he won't be able to make it.

last2, betul pe tanggapan kau.

what's worse is,

die apologize, n die mrh2 kau balik.

suddenly, i don't know u anymore.

anak dara tak senonoh.

hmm.

morn. bru bngn. blerkh.

sudh mula risau dgn exam eim esok.

ak xbce pape lg!

spot topics takde ke? :P

can i write something? can i?

there are days when i wrote multiple posts within 24 hours.

why? mixed feelings.

and today is my [un]lucky day.

this evening, i asked him if we could study together.

he said yes, so i waited. and waited.. and waited...

and lpas maghrib die call.

die ckp xjadi, cuz die pnat.

i was disappointed. but i tried so hard not to let it show.

then i asked "bile awk nk kuar?"

he answered "jap lg..."

and i burst out "cptla, sye lapa nh..."

and ---- silent.

i quickly realized my mistake, and apologized.

he must've been offended, poor thing.

but i've never had any intention to say that.

it just flew out of my mouth.

sorry...

then, i packed my bag with EIM book.

who knows, he might change his mind.

while we waited for the food,

i asked him "kalo sye byr teksi antar awk g mcd nk?"

he replied "hbeh, cne sye nk kua dr uitm?"

i answered "xpe2. sye byr sume..."

he refused. he said he's tired.

hmm. tipulah kalo ckp ak xsedih.

still, ak xnk susahkn die...

so we sat silent, until i feebly said "gudluck..."

i mean for his paper tomorrow.

then he said "jgnla sedih pulak".

sgt tersentap dgn tone ayt die tuh.

then ak diam. sbb ak xnk mrh2 die dh..

after that he did ask me back if i really want to study with him tonight.

of course i said no.

ak xnk die susahkn diri die sbb ak...

i really want to cry kat medan tadi.

i felt like he has somehow lost his patience with me.

i think he'll be fine going thru a few days without me.

so, eventhough he won't realize it,

i'll try hard to

bear with his voice-raising. and care for him.

and understand him. and smile for him.

and not screaming or yelling or being annoying.

to be perfect for him.

:'(

my sunshine. :)

ak sgt jiwang hari nh. or mybe since smlm? :D

there are certain occasions where, uhm...

feelings ak mcm membuak2 kt bf ak,

and then i'll end up texting lovey-dovey messages to him.

eheh. can't help it la.

sometimes ak pun patot manjekn die jugak, kn? hehe.

oh God, how cheesy i am today! :D

i'm glad my sad days are over.

hari2 ak trase ngn member2, and dorg trase ngn ak.

like i say, "ignorance is indeed golden".

applicable when u encounter someone so thoroughly annoying.

mcm mr. A. and mr. A.

erkh, i guess A stands for Annoying then. :D

so, ko ignore jek org2 cm mereka,

then they end up tak kacau idup ko lg dh.

then, td bce blog cuna.

sgt kesian, die rndu2 kt zarif.

cuna, jgn sedih2 ye. cuz we're always here for u. :)

and today, feelings ak sgt2 neutral.

no grudges. no annoyance. ape2 lah yg negatif.

ungku bgn lmbt pn ak xkesah. :D

eventhough it's raining, i feel so sunny. :)

aihh. cmane la ak boleh snang2 hati nih?

eim hapak pn xbce lg. ulang suare, not a single thing.

PELT apetah lg. hoho.

guess i'll start tonight. :)

to my sweetest people,

family, ungku, kye, cuna, atia, classmates, lelemis, membe2 ungku yg ak knal, etc.,

thank you, you've just made my day.

voluntary or not.

i heart you people. :-*